Michael Jackson's childhood issues killed him
Here is a man who could have afforded the best therapy in the world, but probably never sat down in a therapist’s office and discussed his problems. Sure he had psychiatrists who gave him medication, but that only masks the problem.
And that’s what Michael did day after day -- mask his problems, with drugs and even actual masks. Seldom did anyone ever hear about what was going on inside of him. In one of his old interviews that was aired recently, you could see how nervous he got when the interviewer brought up the fact that his dad was abusive to him. He admitted it, but getting him to talk more about it was like pulling teeth. It was a classic sign of denial.
When pushed, he admitted that his father made fun of how he looked and continually told him he had a fat nose. We don’t have to wonder why Michael had such self-esteem issues that he had surgery after surgery on his nose until it was so thin there was nothing left. And his guilt was an issue too. He said that his dad used him as an example to his brothers of how they should act, i.e. “be good” like Michael. He said they got beat more than he did. What pressure and guilt that creates in a young child.
When Michael was a child and his father made fun of the way he looked and taught him that being his human self was not good enough, Michael believed him! Afterall, it was his dad! When we’re little and vulnerable, we don’t know anything else to believe. So, Michael sought approval by changing his looks and seeking more and more success because he thought he wasn’t good enough the way he was. When really, he was the cutest little boy in the world! But all the love by fans could not take away that pain in his soul created in his childhood that maybe he was not “good enough.” Michael stayed in denial and wouldn’t confront his issues from his childhood. When this happens, there is no choice but to look for relief from somewhere -- drugs, alcohol, food, etc. They say he knew he was going to die young. That’s probably because he knew he was never going to deal with his issues, and his life was getting more and more isolated and unhappy and out of control, and he needed to medicate himself more and more to function at all.
With therapy, Michael could have understood that his dad was wrong about a lot of things – about Michael’s looks, about how to handle feelings, about discipline, about how to be a father, and on and on. Michael’s dad obviously has severe control and anger issues. We all see it. With therapy Michael could have understood that whatever his father did to him was never because Michael was “not good enough,” but because of something in the psyche of his father. In Michael’s songs you can hear his searching for answers and for his own identity. And he went to his grave without finding either one.
Michael Jackson's death can be a great message to others: Don't do what Michael did, living out the family legacy. Instead, break out of the pattern by dealing with your issues and creating the intimacy and happiness you want in your life!